How to be happy with a horse

Description:

HOW TO BE HAPPY WITH A HORSE The horse has long been acknowledged as a boon to Man. Richard III knew his value and as long ago as 327 B.C. Alexander the Great named a city after his steed Bucephalus. The Emperor Caligula even provided his horse with an ivory manger and a silver wine bucket. But with the advent of the motor car came a decline in the horse's status, and the resultant inferiority complex sustained by our equine friends has proved one of the horseman's biggest worries. Here, John Harrold's analysis of the situation will be invaluable in assisting us to help the horse rehabilitate himself. As the author points out, the trouble is that although all horses are equine, some are more equine than others. Equinity—the neurosis ingrained in the horse since he was demoted by the automobile, thus causing him to feel allergic to anything on four wheels—is a complex which expresses itself in hostile horseplay, like biting the hand that feeds it and kicking over the traces or water-bucket or anything else within range. You can do much to help your horse rid himself of his Equineurotic ways. There is the question of his comfort for instance: do you ensure that his stable is well furnished and his bed suitable? Do you keep the T.V. to yourself or are you an enlightened owner and share it with your horse ? And of course there is food—has it ever occurred to you that your nag may not like oats ? Can you mix a carrot cocktail or conjure up a tasty meat cutlet to tempt him at breakfast ?

subjects: Anecdotes, facetiae, satire,  Horsemanship

People: Alexander the Great,  Richard III